it cannot be done, he is unbreakable.
What?
..he cannot be seduced..she had to have roofied him.
Details.
Todays outfit involves shorts with embroidered fish. This kids gonna die.
you would pick up someone in the library
They still haven't come up with a cure for a hangover; good luck cancer.
I'm in the library if you wanna come give me library head.
Its only.eleven and we are already chasing a man on a bike with a bag full of burger king
It'll be a Christmas-Fucking-Miracle if we get through the ceremony without a groomsman vomming
He got punched in the face, dropped his laptop down a flight of stairs, and broke his roommate's lava lamp, getting all the toxic lava goo everywhere. This is why we don't let him get drunk. And yet here we are.
These are your "grown up" slampiece's new hours of operation; please plan accordingly
think I signed up for a 5k last night while blackout.
When he swipes my v card it will be comparable to my bat mitzvah. should I make sweatshirts or sweatpants?
Sexiest use of a semi colon this week, congratulations.
Yes but I said "let's get a dog" not a drunk human so some rules will be established this evening
I just wish the first erections of my life didn't take place at a dentists office but hey whatever I turned out alright
Well it might’ve been because you asked to play What Makes You Beautiful at the club
Randomize
