i just had sex. the condom broke. we're sleeping in to separate beds. And im in albany
Whenever ur ready we need breakfast and a psychic.
its 4th on my favorites list. 1. butt sex 2. mini skirts 3. three meat pizza rolls 4. fuck the pain away by peaches
got some bad news about ur virginity. she didnt make it thru the night
I just pooped in his toilet and didn't flush...I desperately need to get him past the girls don't poop phase.
I'm proud of our boobs and what they could potentially achieve in life.
I kept petting the scarves and telling customers to "feel that shit"
Stop drinking at work.
She was wasted talking to my dad about the hunger games than she passed out in the shower and flooded the hotel room...
She was blowing me when her roommate came in and goes "you want me to tap in?"
You realize once your inheritance is finalized this shit will stop happening right?
Also, I'm going to TRY and be casual this weekend, but really, we need to be serious about equally dividing our time between party and bullshit.
I need a costume for that party. Even if I'm just taking it off.
Do you ever get so high you're like vibrating
I know its 2 in the morning and everything. But i just straight up yelled "DON'T YOU UNDERSTAND THIS WORLD IS DIFFICULT ENOUGH AS IT IS WITHOUT YOU PULLING THIS BULLSHIT ON ME" to my taco. Because it fell apart on me. I think i might be cracking under this finals pressure.
You will be reminded everyday when you witness my majestic mustache.
thank you for the vibrator recommendation, i've come six times today and it's only noon
Randomize
