I want to make Jon&Kate babies with him. Not in quantity, but in percentage asian.
Do you realize we just stole 12 dollars worth of quarters each from the office petty cash just to get manicures? New high or New Low?
i wish there were pregnant emoticons
i just threw up ON my final. epic way to end the semester.
Where can I buy a trophy for a Groupie Award?
She had sex with a merch guy. . . band guys make you groupies, Merch guys just means she's easy.
judging by the cake all over the hall, my neighbors had a pretty successful thursday too.
everytime someone would look at you, you started to try and deep throat your beer bottle.
Im gonna need you to always be ready for drinking or this will never work. grow up peter pan.
So it sounded like a midget was barfing IN our walls again this morning ...
One day. I will touch his hair. I'm curious if it'll be like a soft cloud.
honestly i just want a cigarette and someone to go down on me... are you interested in helping with either of those
I'm drinking and working out! I'm bench pressing the beer pong table and doing push ups and lifting the chair.
Dude we gotta go back to your cabin. left glenn. he's calling me crying and still drunk
I WOULD SERIOUSLY RECOMMEND THE SHIT THAT I AM ON RIGHT NOW
And to be clear I have only watched porn like 3 times at work
Randomize
