That's the secret to virgins: blizzards.
david just texted me. reply with photo of genitalia? y/n
for future reference: playing drunken strip-twister is a euphemism for a threesome. just thought you should know.
I'm not sure, 7-8, the last bit was a rush of at least three blended together. Basically you fucked me so stupid that I can't even recall the number of orgasms.
So you know, I'm making that my facebook status.
And then you'll find yourself a hot chick and leave me behind with nothing but my back fat to keep me company.
I've figured out why I love winter sex. Because I make them leave the beanie on, and we all know I love a man in a beanie.
A big thanks to that bride-to-be, Her fiance and his loaded friends will forever hold a place in my heart for the generous tequila body shots on the couch at Henry's.
So I'm not dead, but close call. I think I can handle one more bar.
I was hoping for a marriage proposal... Or at least an offer to sleep in his bed.
Nothing but goodness could come from two friends getting naked. Think of all the good advice and other things we could give to each other.
There are far too many naked dudes in your apartment, and they aren't even watching porn. I mean seriously, they've got the Lion King on.
Is it bad that we left the kid passed out on the bus? I think his name was texas. I was too drunk to be questioning this.
its hard to say precisely how it happened, but the next thing i knew i was on top of a mountain
I’m appalled by how severely I lower my standards when I’m horny & impaired
He deliberately gets me high because he knows I fuck better and then I make food for two. I don't know if I should feel mad or proud of him for thinking that far.
Randomize
