Potential corruption. He's 19.
Get them while they're young!
Omg my grandpa just told me he wants to die in his 90's shot by a jealous husband
I just puked in an auto zone parking lot. I'm never eating peanut butter and red wine for dinner again.
After last night's events, I googled "how to change your life direction." I found a really helpful ehow.com article.
i now have a sippy cup solely for the purpose of drinking alcohol out of...am i an alcoholic?
defrosting a beer in the microwave. no sparks so far.
So I just learned that my father was teaching me rules for drinking games when I was 5.
he gave me a new purse full of weed and five boxes of samoas for my birthday. best boyfriend ever.
I dunno what he did but it both burns and feels amazing to pee
that was THE gayest party i've ever been to
To be fair, the theme was Cabaret. I don't know what you were expecting.
I wasn't a groupie because I didn't carry his guitar home
I'm pretty sure male strippers are the last things I need in my life right now.
Just give me 5 advils and some sunglasses and I'll knock out on this couch no problem.
He said "send me a motivational picture" so I sent one with mayo on my face that said "clearly I'm no stranger to white stuff on my face"...I'm the fuckingng worst
Would you still love me if I got a Whatever Forever tattoo? It's like the Emo kids' Live Laugh Love
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