we went to that german restaurant and drank out of the boots. Then I threw up into one
saw him outside... he got fatter, i got blonder. the winner is obvious.
I least I know I can't get pregnant because it's on my hair
side note. good thing you didn't come to drunk breakfast. we were judged by children.
So I just told the bartender I would go down on her. You need to get here
First week back and I made to one class, its gonna be okay after all.
She said we "made love." I had to explain to her that when both parties agree that the first time time they have sex both people agree to video tape the whole thing its not "making love" but more like random good time fun sex.
Come to the roof. We are drinking breakfast.
He slapped my ass and his clap-on light turned on.
HELP! How do I get paint off the dog?
So basically I really like drugs AND banging cops and it's starting to get complicated
You gonna smoke this blunt? Or are you gonna keep doing Kung-fu in my kitchen?
Have you ever drank bourbon in your underwear while wearing a Santa hat and reflecting on the decisions of your life? Asking for a friend.
I'm driving to work hungover. I feel like I got hit by a train and then drank that train too.
Oh man I knew I took that Molly too soon, talkin to some Scottish people lol but don’t like rollin in pizza restaurants.
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