Don't forget I'm 20 now
I liked you more when you were 19
My feet smell like cheese. Makes me hungry.
She said her name was "party"
Have fun fixing the bed from last night Bob Villa.
At least you didn't call me Brittany this time
I dont understand how a fully grown man could convince himself that lime green crocks would look good on him.
i swear to god her finding her clit was like looking for a sock in a dryer full of beach towels
Eventually evolution will just give us a better liver anyway, so our great great grandkids should THANK us for our binge drinking.
I am 100% positive that I have seen a porno that was shot in this bar.
who paints a picture of their own dick and sends it to people. i dont know if its borderline crazy or just fucking genius...
literally overdrew my bank account at 3 in the morning to eat subway with 7 sherriffs.
thank you for extending my knowledge of the effects of vodka. speak of what happened last night and i will kill you and send your fingers to your loved ones.
I remember grabbing your ass. So firm. So right. I don't regret it.
Im so hungover I just threw up at the sight of a CARTOON CRABBY PATTY
We always have to do something together that tests the human limits of the body. Hopefully it has at least a 75% death rate.
I knew I wanted to marry her when we got in that bar fight and she full-nelsoned a guy while I worked his kidneys. I knew then we had to breed
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