plz talk dirty to me
Yeh xou jao i ama wa7tdud !!
Oh my god. its not even twelve thirty and you are useless.
Okay call me later ill be watching lifetime and scrubbing throw up off my feet
i overslept, had to take a cab to the train station, might puke, bought the wrong flavored vitamin water, and mj's dead. what a terrible world to wake up to.
He left an unopened 12 pack of beer by my bed. I guess that's his way of saying thanks for the sex..
dude, I just walked in on your little brother changing clothes...I'm ashamed to say I noticed, but that kid has as MASSIVE cock...
Yeah...we all know. it's the elephant in the room at family gatherings.
that is a frighteningly accurate metaphor for it.
There was a bottle of vodka and chips in a vase next to the bed
Dude you're alone at a bar with a woman, and you're talking about my junk?
I didn't ask to see his penis, it was an ambush. Impressive though
You told me you would ride a pig into the night sky screaming, "I wear my sunglasses at night"
Dont worry bro, i'll be the designated kayaker. I wouldnt want u to be drinking and kayaking.
we're drinking bellinis i mean god's titty nectar
I just love that a strip club has taco Tuesday.
It was a good dick. I give credit where credit is due. A good dick deserves praise.
...okay, you can't just say 'masturbating llama' and not explain yourself
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