all I know is if I don't watch spice world right now there will be a firefight.
if being creepy is wrong, then i don't want to be right
he just had his sister send me a message about how he's not a creeper
Was his mother too busy breastfeeding him to do it?
Were making a bet for which twin will relapse while in rehab. I'm going for the chubbier one
The kid next to me is typing a powerpoint presentation.. title: Reasons to Wear a Condom, subtitle: The Ian Story
The first slide was titled: You Could Get a Girl Pregnant.
He just said he was the Jesus of alcoholics.
We got really high and decided it would be a good idea to wash towels in the dishwasher. I left before I could see the final result.
She wouldn't put out on the first date. I think my boner put a hole in my mattress.
I think we need a list of things that are automatic NO's for dating a guy. Married, definitely a no now
He saved that picture of my boobs for good luck romance still exists
I just used Bacardi to dry out poison ivy.
What could go wrong? i could have a mental breakdown with a bottle of champagne hand cuffed to a frat bro
I've made a new rule for socializing in the winter: if it doesn't involve me orgasming or getting drunk I can't make it
sometimes i just have a bad day n consider lowering my standards
I gave him breakup sex, AGAIN
Randomize
