should i be impressed or disgusted that i was spitting glow-in-the-dark?
Had a student tell me he misses the old Four Loko. He's in 7th grade. No one is allowed to claim I started drinking too young ever again.
My dealer threw in a "freestyle rap" today with my purchase. I dont know if I can handle this relationship.
She was literally passed out in a cubicle with a flask in her hand. I LOVE finals week!
He seems to have a lot of things figured out and most of the answers involve bourbon
I'm gonna drop in for a zip later man. It made me wanna eat my girls shampoo. Good shit
The cop told us he we helped him pass his monthly bong quota. He almost ran out of room on the hood of his car..
I have visions of guys in cheetah costumes with suits over it pissing on a children how are you
Judging by his bulge. This guy is going home with me. Who doesn't want a dick that looks like it used to be a pillar in Rome.
That's a lot of judgement coming from a man wearing a dress made from a bedsheet.
tinder day one and i already had more guys message me about "the girl with the big tits in my second picture" than about me. MY 17 YEAR OLD SISTER CAN GET LAID WITHOUT EVEN HAVING TO MAKING A PROFILE
to be fair she does have a great rack
I like to be the stable force in your otherwise chaotic existence.
I went to steal condoms from your room and all I could find was chik fil a sauce
He put your tit in his mouth. Professionalism is out the window after that.
okay valid
You can't say that. Only if you have peed on the side of the highway in daylight while signing Christmas songs can you say that.
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