Afterall, it is the real San Francisco treat
I just got cut off for correcting the bartender's grammar. I should have never accepted that fucking editors position.
if you were drunk and peed in your friend's washing maching, would you send an "i'm sorry" text or say nothing at all?
all hypothetical of course
New game: Step 1) Turn on ESPN. Step 2) Drink every time someone says "LeBron."
We found him. 8 blocks away from the bars and almost at his parent's house. On the verge of tears.
He ran five blocks just to watch me and my best friend make out. I think he's a keeper.
All I can see in the pic you sent is white shorts...
Thas my pasnts in colleg! Tehy glow! AND SMELL LIKE BEER!
Just found a condom on my floor from last weekend. 2/2. The scavenger hunt is over.
In the ER with Chelz, I may have broken her ankle during sex. Lovely.
My phone just said I texted someone at 430a and said let's fight. Then I texted them an hour later and said thanks.
And then god smiled down upon me and he said let there be hangover food and let it be Wendy's
I was going to make you have an awkward boner around all your coworkers but then I fell asleep.
I was really hoping my 420 would involve a lot more weed and a lot less buttholes
I'm totally picking out my shrooming outfit and blankets right now
Hey do u remember the time we used my mascara wand as a drink stirer?
Randomize
