Jeremys mom is here. I gave her mad jello shots and now were griding. ima give it to her: ultimate payback for him fucking my gf.
i don't even want to say how many boners i've caused this week
Besides, I'm not in my 30's. I'm still allowed to drink wine from a bag.
They were actually really boring considering how we met them.
howd you meet them?
They got shit-faced and decided to take a train to a city none of them had ever been to. We found them wandering the ghetto, with a bottle of gin and singing Disney songs.
Yea he doesn't really know about any of this yet but my game plan is to keep wowing him with my vagina and cooking skills. It's up too future me to handle the rest.
I've already made the "blackout on move in day" decision
Seriously? You DON'T remember putting all those Swedish fish in the waffle iron b/c you wanted "One big Swedish fish?" That waffle iron was a wedding gift.
I don't think you should be sorry for such memorable sex that I yell your name when you aren't around.
I feel like a pizza delivery girl of vagina tho
I can't believe i just offerred a guy a burrito and head, and got turned down. Officially celibate now.
I don't know what's worse the fact that I woke up with a clit piercing or the fact that I didn't pay for it.
He saved that picture of my boobs for good luck romance still exists
Last nights hook up turn into a star wars history lesson.. He's luck y he's pretty..
Sleeping with him wouldn't be considered hoeing out... It seems more like babysitting.
Lol, yeah it'll be fun,but will it be cereal and dick pics fun?
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