You just took 4 shots. 2 of them were maple syrup.
I think I might be in your shoes. Except they are actually my shoes. Either way these shoes are wasted.
If burritos were dicks, we'd have a serious relationship problem on our hands. Just saying.
A guy in a big stork costume just came to our meeting to give us condoms and t-shirts telling us not to get pregnant. Only at college
He's either a really good actor or an actual prince, I'm fine with both so I'll sleep with him.
He was sitting cross legged outside his tent repeatedly hitting the ground with a hammer and shouting 'this.is.a.good.idea.'
Just walked in on the Yellow Ranger getting porked by a guy in a UD Blue Hen costume. Will somebody PLEASE think of the children.
I think you blew our chances when you yelled "YOU SLUTS COMING TO THE TITTIE BAR?" in their face
I would call you but I don't feel like these hands belong to me.
Mm. I just want to eat pancakes off of his fine ass.
You me handle of captain and a sorostitute study sesh, if we don't get laid mancards must be relinquished
it's always good to have a friend that's a hairdresser, a massage therapist, maybe throw in a lawyer just in case, and always have a friend on food stamps
The economy cant be that bad, I willingly got fired to bang her again.
Three cheers for handling my crush on my boss in an entirely reasonable manner, by having a threesome with my coworkers.
My nipples are YOUNG and they need TWISTING
Randomize
