Do you ever think that bumblebee is the gay transformer?
Every day of my life.
I put my bosses number in my phone as "Do not call," I shouldve known my drunk curiosity would overcome any desire I had to keep my job.
again?
u downloaded tardy 4 the party
then u started screaming about not wanting nene on the record
Please don't die.. At a gay bar... On a Wednesday. Obituaries are not allowed to be that entertaining.
Your brother came in a girls mouth for the first time last night... Ah the tales told whilst buying minors beer.
Please stop hiding condoms in my house. If I want to have sex with you, I will let you know. FYI, my mom found the ones hidden behind the milk. She was not happy.
Just took last nights make up off with a sock. That hungover.
I wish I could but I can't. No beer pong or sex on a hammock...such an unproductive weekend
He sent me a picture of his dick earlier so now we can all laugh at him tomorrow
The liquor stores are closed! NOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOO! CURSE YOU SANDY!!!!
We celebrated International Women's Day by spending $700 and taking our tops off at the strip club
The boys offered to pay but we went halfs because we're feminists
Don't act like you're not jealous that I disappeared into the closet to blow my husband. Marriage = all the cock I want.
Men are too sensitive. They need to learn to handle me.
...i have a beer in one hand, and a chicken wing in the same. typical tuesday, right?
Are we allowed to ho on the roof?
Randomize