haha you were like: "I don't want to uh pressure you.." as you took your own shirt off
Their flight hasn't even left yet and the 'buy food to keep yourself alive' budget is gone on tequila.
She checked into foursquare right as she left work so he would think she was there late and not on some other guy's dick
I have to say for barely passing high school, that girl is a genius.
Talking to a male stripper. About the LSAT. Only in Vegas.
She is singing the swedish chef song and throwing utensils. I love this place
Santa was walking around downtown handing out stuff at the bars. He gave me a free eyebrow wax. I think he's trying to tell me something
With your fertility you would just get contact pregnant
His idea of role playing was him wearing the halloween mitt romney mask while I gave him head
Did I really drink that whole bottle of Jack Daniels last night?
Heroically.
I am never taking a razor down there again. He'll have to love me as I am.
I found out he put two potatoes in a jar because he wants to make his own vodka.
Cheez-its and a bottle of cab...for under $10 you could win this girls heart
I'm so glad you haven't fallen off any more yachts
If we hadn't just agreed to no commitment, i'd totally propose right now. Best. Fuckbuddy. Ever.
What. The. Fuck.
You'll have to be more specific. I do a lot of "what the fuck" kind of stuff
Randomize
