i realized that the internet ruins the joy of a father passing down playboys to his son
There isn't a single transaction on my online bank account that doesn't involve drugs or alcohol since November 12
he asked me if i "normally slept like that" because i was curled up in a ball facing the wall. then he told me that i woke up in the middle of the night and said "oh my god. i forgot you were here." how did he not understand that i didn't want him in my bed.
We should probably just have a threeway and get everyone on the same page.
Somehow "stranger danger" turned into making out with a 25 year old on burbon street.
I know your texting costs money, but I'll pay for it if you consider this. Oversized frozen jello shots. I'll buy everything needed if you approve. Let me know
Just saw a cougar do the walk of shame. She asked housekeeping where the fastest elevator was.
Missing both credit cards and just had a flashback of grinding my nuts on the terrified cab driver for amusement. i am feeling a slight hate for myself right now.
"Every minute you spend hanging out with David is a minute you could spend meeting someone new, who isn't a huge douche" - Buddha
I have no idea, but there's a bus parked in front of my house and like 6 texts saying im gonna prove my love. this is either really really awesome or really really bad.
I haven't filled him in on Operation "find a sugar daddy & suck dick for money" yet, but I'm sure he just wants me to be happy.
We had a One Night Stand 6 months ago but he just Facebook invited me to his wedding. Who the fuck does that.
Am I supposed to get so horny by looking at your dick that I start orgasming uncontrollably
I JUST REALIZED THAT SINCE LEIA IS TECHNICALLY A PRINCESS AND KYLO REN IS HER SON AND STAR WARS IS OWNED BY DISNEY...KYLO REN IS LITERALLY A DISNEY PRINCE.
Oh my Gods. Why. Why did you have to tell me that. D:
SO YOU CAN SUFFER HAVING THAT KNOWLEDGE TOO.
Do you really want to know anything about the inner machinations of a furry's mind
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