is it wrong that I prefer my women with low self esteem and a smidgen of an eating disorder?
I think a girl in front of me glued an ugg tag to a weird pair of boots.
Relationship's official after skype sex--college kid at his finest.
I dont think punching her boob is the type of reverse psychology that will get her to blow you.
Nothing is more awkward than taking a dump while someone is crying in the bathroom.
My dad got me a charm braclet....his way of trying to support my gayness....
At least she'll always have a story about the time she showed up to the emergency room drunk and covered in chocolate syrup on her birthday.
I do wanna see you. And we can just lay here and watch a movie and listen to me cry.
I rocked my own world, he was just a prop.
Also, for real, though? Did we even have sex or were we just jumping on the bed drunk and naked...because with me that's actually a possibility.
Hold on, I'm taking nudes in a blanket fort right now
I'm not going out, it's sweat pants and gallon vodka night at my place and I'm the only one on the guest list.
This is because you lost at fooseball isn't it?
I'll give you one guess. It has a cock and I want it
So anyways, we returned the toilet paper and decided to use the money for taco bell and slurpees instead...
I'm literally watching a webcam of the Vegas strip right now and it is making me sad.
Randomize
