How long do you need to date somebody until it is acceptable to fart in their presence?
The real question is how long do you need to date them to dutch oven them?
Do you think when graham bell invented the phone he ever thought that people would be using them to facebook on the shitter?
we just ha sex. he lasted two minutes. i told him to leave because i had class
isnt today saturday?
We're friends. And when I drunkenly send u a pic of my left testicle i would appreciate a response.
I just past a guy who was biking and double fisting wit glass beer bottles. That is what i call talent
first day of class and my professor asked me if i was going to come to class drunk all semester.
I think I dropped my cock ring in your back yard
Miller High Life will be the death of me. Well, that and shower sex.
I would compare it to a jeffrey but in smoothie form. More drugs in here than Bobby Brown's sock drawer.
Just got cockblocked by my GF's wedding shower... That's a first. And I have to buy a gift.
Woke up this morning with fake blood all over my bed which is a positive considering last year it was all real blood
Well my summer has already been productive. I partially caused a divorce.
IT'S LIKE LOOKING INTO GOD'S VAGINA!!!!
I've had more sex since the twins moved in than I'd had in the previous four years. They are the best wingman ever.
Of course he’s picking me up at the airport. I taught him the Lotus position last time we had sex.
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