FYI..good luck when you get back from work.. mom and dad know about the boy you brought home last night
haha good one..how did you even know?
we all know. he obviously didn't leave when you might have told him to.. he came down when we were eating because he coud smell mom's cooking. the dude ate with us and offered to say grace. so yeah, good luck.
there's a guy here who looks like a hipster got a hold of obama and gave him a makeover.
I just spent the last 30 minutes shaving my asshole.
We can get Dustin to help us. I think he'd be good at luring girls into a dark alley.
afterwards we were spooning and he said he wished he was a kangaroo so he cold put me in his pouch and keep me forever. I left as soon as he was asleep.
found POGS while I was cleaning my room this morning. Definitely bringing them back to school to turn into a drinking game.
And then he said "if you were planning on bird feeding me that's not ok"
I puked so hard this morning that I peed my pants. I'm a gem.
We're exchanging our favorite porn sites at 9 am. I think this brings our relationship to a whole new level
I have this vague feeling that I was involved in a dance off with a homeless man?
Alright I'd bang a 4 sober, It's been like 3-4 weeks or how ever long 4th of July was ago. I wanna fuck something.
4th of July was 12 days ago. The date is literally in the text you just sent.
I don't care about the dates I just wanna bone something.
He's watching Always Sunny and eating refried beans straight from the can.
This will never work. His dick is smaller than mine.
Wow. And yours is kind of small.
RIGHT?
I think I was just motorboated by a 4-year old girl.
Wait you took his virginity AND broke his bed doing it
I know! I’m the best!
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