Ok I can't be your drugdealer AND booty call AND friend. It just doesn't work that way
Well hello freshman 15, didn't see you there until I tried on last years summer clothes.
One of the bamboo sticks broke and impaled him. I think he's drunk enough that it shouldn't hurt until tomorrow.
It's official. I now have that "I was drunk and needed the money" college story to share later in life.
His body is just chiseled out of sex. I would let that man do anything to my body. Including fuck me while my parents watch
Her boyfriend was wrestling another girl. But, she said she was okay with it because she kept checking for boners--w the back of her hand like she was checking for a fever
Im so excited to get permanently banned for life from all the old bars again, it is gonna be christmas after all
Synchronized big wheels back flips off the second floor roof. Good idea or great idea?
See, thats where im at with my life, welcome to the slut yaht we will be cruising comfortably all summer at an extremely drunken relaxing pace S.S. Slut Bucket
She's barefoot and topless screaming "HERE KITTY-KITTY" at a stray cat in the ditch on the side of the highway. How do I get her back in the car?
I drink to make the karaoke go away.
Come over. I've made 2 dinners and so many cocktails. I'm a 50's housewife with no family.
It may not have seemed like it to you, but I was very sad that I was cheating on my GF with you. I was crying on the INSIDE.
You had sex with a guy who has a purple beard last night. No Molly for a while, ok?
If you are refering to the duckling living in your bath...I can explain, but before I do, can you throw a peice of bread in there?
Randomize
