Well it's been 24 hours and I still feel like a mammoth sat on my balls
i mean, not my actual scene but if someone says "PARTY" ill figure it out
Come to wine Wednesday bro. We have a fog machine
THESE BITCHES NOT IN MY MAJOR BETTER NOT FILL UP MY SLAVIC FAIRYTALES CLASS
I owe you cheese. The drunk munchies don't acknowledge food ownership.
We got to the second bar and all he kept saying was "I'm on an alcohol safari!" Best 21st birthday ever.
This girl looks like an elf and is obviously on coke. I want to be her.
So is that the only criterion for shenanigans now? Don't die?
My vibrator box just fell off the table and hit my cat in the head, he is a little stunned. Good thing I went medium size
There is a high pitched squealing noise coming from somewhere in my house. I hope it's a gas leak cause I'm over this week man.
Within the first 2 minutes of this morning, I found out the Lions lost on last play, and Scott Weiland died. I wont be in today.
He is getting no nudes from me. I don't even care if I'm losing his legal advice.
Btw I'm playing passed out so you can get laid but obviously you need to take the offense just ask him if he wants to go to bed and leave a cigg on the counter
You make me want to do things that I'm pretty sure are illegal.
Am i obligated to tell my sister her girlfriend was my one night stand three months ago?
Randomize
