Make me a promise>>> if you ever see the brats from that tv show NYC Prep walking around, you will trip them, and you wil throw drinks on them
I can't believe I wasted a google wave invite on her.
I am going to be the most sexually active ladybug that he has ever seen
i've never seen someone face fit so perfectly in a toilet bowl
you asked the janitor if you could ride his floor cleaner.
Wheres my "thanks for using birth control effectively and not contributing to the downfall of society" card.
Wine floats aren't as good of an idea as they seem
Who the hell poured a whole pouch of Capri Sun down my throat last night?
We're gonna take a moment of silence to pray... that his penis is as pretty and as talented as his brothers.
I ended up with bruises on the back of my knees. Tell me again how I did this?
Anderson Cooper just came out.
Crying tears of glitter and rainbows right now. Gonna decorate my dildo like My Little Pony in his honor.
We lost you in the mall, but to no surprise we found you waiting in line to sit on santas lap. You said you wanted to ask him for a pound of weed and a subway giftcard for xmas.
Best feeling in the world is getting a random boob pic from a drunk chick at 3 am.
I totally have a huge crush on him though which is fucking up my "classy she-demon with limited feelings" vibe
I just ate a handful of salt
I thought this was a good idea
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