you always know who the new freshman are on fb because theyre always wearing prom dresses
I just woke up in bed with 4 girls. Either i dont remember the best night of my life or they think im gay.
I woke up to a text that said "You're a fucking asshole" Why is she so pissed at me?
Im guessing it has something to do with running up to her boyfriend screaming "THIS IS SPARTA" and kicking him in the balls.
Is that considered a cock block?
Elton John & Lady Gaga just did a duet on the Grammies. How appropriate. He likes cock & she happens to have one.
I am standing at the lion i publicly humped last night. i am mortified.
four guys that i have slept with have come into my job today. FOUR. i feel like it's like bring your sex partners to work day.
Do you think she's aware of my deep hatred or should I set her hair on fire in her sleep?
I basically have a picture with a half naked foreign exchange student. He kept screaming rolltide and i felt like a traitor
Shrimp lo Mein doused in green apple Smirnoff is a rare delicacy only a few get to experience..guess I should consider myself lucky
So it's always a good weekend when you don't get any sleep, try opening a bottle of wine on rocks, and end up needing a tetanus booster for our stupidity... Same thing next weekend?
He's rapping about a turtle neck sweater. Please come get me.
While he was gone for spring break I took his head board... I don't wanna wake up from his shenanigans for the rest of my college career.
I tried to avoid catching feelings but then he took me out to breakfast
and i thought it was paint or jizz but it was cheese
please tell me you didnt taste test that
the next morning we realized we didnt speak the same language... guess i subconsciously did learn a little german last semester. thanks study abroad.
ah the experiences a semester in Vienna can give you. Frau would enjoy knowing that even while sleeping during class you still managed to learn enough german to get laid
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