No one appreciates an amoeba in a balloon hat.
I just wish we had the ability to download food from our TVs.
Grossest hangover story of 09: Puked in the bathtub. I was in it.
i dont remember who you are as you are in my phone as "mr. peanut."
note to self..putting cheap vodka in a bottle of grey goose does not make it taste better
Only my sister would update her facebook status while going into labor.
I mean, there was frosting being put on a tunafish sandwich. Pretty sure she knew we were high.
i had confetti in my bra
i still find it in random places like a shoe or my car. that week haunts me
I made my own utility belt like Batman. It has a cup holder for my beer, cell phone holder, a little pocket for condoms, and a sewing kit just in case.
I'm assuming the reason my elbow is so sore has something to do with all the broken shot glasses eh?
Yep
I think I'm going to contact pbr and see if they'll sponsor our dreams
just got a call from a life insurance sellsperson and apparently our xany dealer referenced us. not cool thats breaking the 4th wall
Our first time hooking up was on New Years and we've managed to hook up every holiday since, I'm hoping this lasts until 2016 just to fulfill my American Holiday sex fantasy I never knew I had
My only contacts are booty calls or the club hockey team.
I was told i took a shot doing a headstand in the backseat then proceeded to barf all over my face
I had no idea you were so talented.
Randomize
