Gayer than 8 guys blowing 9 guys
wow, that really makes you stop and think.
Dude i just saw JT leaving the hospital. He drove there to get fluids because he was too drunk, so they hooked him up to an IV so he didn't get alcohol poisoning. Did I mention he drove there? Oh yea and our roommates in the hospital with alcohol poisoning, she just puked up coal. So many ppl are here, it's like a hospital party, I love spring quarter!
So yes it WAS her period, NOT a nose bleed.
so hey instead of everyone buying me a birthday present can everyone just pitch in for my abortion?
I was amazed that you fell flat on your ass and still managed not to spill them drinks in your hands. Your getting good at this.
Urine might work for jellyfish stings, but we found out it doesn't work well for nose bleeds...
Dude she pregamed for her sorority's philanthropy.
Lying on this bed is like lying on love and marshmallows and joy
We established that I was in 5th grade when she was in her final year of grad school. Her daughter is also in 5th grade.
I woke up on top of his counter next to a pot of boiling water and an empty package of ramen... what happened to the ramen, we will never know.
She loves introducing her friends to my foreskin.
The three of us were sitting silently in my dining room at 4:30 am, half drunk, eating cold spaghetti and listining to death metal. I need a fucking cigarette.
I'm not getting off this floor. I love this floor
you missed a good time last night.
you texted me at 10 telling me to come fuck you, that says enough.
I had to break up with her. She was sending me study schedules and recipes for vegan lasagna. I’m just trying to survive man
Randomize
