So I went to have a snack...can you please tell me why there's a condom in the hummus?
We were just about to get down to business and shes like oh the olympics! and jumped up and turned on the tv. cockblocked by freestyle skiing. seriously?
Who won mens moguls?
That canadian guy... bilodeau... but you're missing the point, dude.
And then she proceeded to fling her bra around while screaming the rocket power theme song, still managing to not fall off the skateboard
I don't care how old I am, if it's your 21st birthday I'm going to make out with you.
dude he was laying on two half-naked chicks, as they rubbed him down with lotion, while rolling a joint. hes like a modern-day african king
They tried. Someone started to yell beer shower but he spun around and punched them in the mouth before they even finished saying beer. He's a fast little drunk.
I like you as a friend, but I'm in love with your dick.
I just haven't been myself lately. I slept with a guy 21 years older than me and I've been wearing my hair in a center part.
Yea, she's 42 I'm 23. Girls our age are terrible. All they need is a divorce and a bottle of wine
Because drinking and showering don't go hand in hand. There that's my PSA of the day.
Would it be rude to use my vibrator? like he forfeited his right to be mad when he left me orgasmless...right?
Where the fuck are you? I just got punched in the nose by a tourist
he just fucked me for my cheese..
Something like; Dear Cupid, when are you going to send me someone to date that isn't a complete psychopath
I am high. And my mom surpised me today. Now i am high and with my mom....bad idea
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