what happens if a cat eats a birth control pill? i mean i don't care about the cat i really just don't want to get pregnant
At one point during the moaning he reminded me of Forrest Gump
Mother fucker. I'm a 30J now. I'm fucking speechless
his penis is PERFECT
I want to put it in a shoebox and place cottonbls around it to protect it from any harm
or knit it little hat
In need of cum proof mascara. Don't judge me.
I'm really sorry I gave you road head last night and made you drive over and break the sprinkler system.
Are we still banned from the library?
Just did a relay race involving shotgunning beers, cannonballs and riding a blowup whale. Never want to leave vacation.
Some guy offered you 100 bucks last night to suck your toes. I had to drag you away while you were yelling at me, "Stop money cock blocking me!"
That's just where I'm at in my life.
P.S. I just made up pleasure scepter for the purpose of that last message.
conclusion from last night: i should wear boob glitter more often
I need my daily rules like rule one don't put your dick in the vacuum cleaner
I have jizz, in my hair. I'm sitting in class with jizz. In. My. Hair. I need to make better life choices.
I was just dry heaving outside of the Chem building when a guided tour walked by. Welcome to the Maritimes kids...
Interlocking vagina powers go!!'
Oh god, your drunk again aren't you?
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