sometimes you just have to masturbate at your friend's house.
I just saw a woman point to her daughter and scream at her husband THIS IS YOUR GENES, THIS IS YOU.
the trick is not to think about where her tounge has been.
By the way, thank you for feeding me fries when I was sitting on the floor.
No im just getting a road beer. You got my pants?
Making cookies for neighbors. Spill beer all over dough. Bake anyways. From good neighbors back to the shitty college kids next door in under 3 seconds.
He used Kanye West lyrics to justify what happened and I accepted his logic
So, settle a debate for my housemates. Have you measured your dick. And how long. Results Will not be disclosed
I think I used my NERF gun during sexual roleplay. Need to re-evaluate my life choices.
fries before guys. food before dudes. shakes before dates. chips before dicks. lemon bars before football stars. macaroni before screwin' tony. what i'm saying is please come to ladies' night
Just whatever you do, don't neglect the balls.
a large sweaty girl i dont know is sleeping in my bed. A scotish man and a small child looking dude are on the couches im on the floor sleeping and im ok with it
oh i see... well this is a positive first step in you courting him for sex.
You barfed off the front porch while the elderly neighbors were walking their dog. We had to convince them not to call 911.
Pics or it didn't happen.
You had a 45min conversation with the Ronald McDonald statue I have the video to prove it
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