I woke up this morning and thought "Im sure I've seen this house in a porno" and instantly googlemapped myself
susan atkins died, charles manson's lady
dont cry, there are other serial killers to crush on.
yeah she was being a bitch. do you remember me stealing ryan cabrerra's beer?!?!
I mean, how many people can say they helped surgically remove something from their body? Other than the guy that got his hand stuck under a rock and cut it off. Doesn't count
There's going to be a pool, lightsabers and alcohol. What could go wrong?!
All I've done this weekend is cum and drink. I think it's safe to say I'm dehydrated.
I know I've never told you this before.. but Gyro sauce makes everything okay.
Don't blame me. My vagina leads me astray.
I had the hottest doctor assess me at the hospital. He smelled like heaven and sex.
I will take a ruler to your dick so help me god
She did NOT find it funny to come upstairs to find me with the word "MISERY" written on my forehead in magic marker and the label to the vodka bottle replaced with a scrap of paper taped around that says "COMPANY"
i feel like if my pee,blood, or vomit is on it...it should belong to me by default. can we make that a rule?
We had everything under control until this one jackass fucked up. Thanks, Peter.
good morning. i just did a walk of shame in front of his grandmother.
I'm doing my accounting homework with my vibrator. Guess whose numbers are balanced on the financial statement? This ladys!
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