Michael Bay diarrhea
i just traded a sweatshirt for margaritas... why did they ever stop using the barter system??!!
Oh my god. Oh my god. Oh my god. I drunk emailed a professor on friday. Oh my god. Oh my god.
just used a paint mixing cup as a shot glass. thank u art school.
These 3 days between Christmas and new years when all the bosses are on vacation are essentially a competition to see who can do the least amount of work
Held my professor's hair back while she was puking. I'd better get an A out of this or else the pics are going on Facebook.
It's a long way off yet but I've started planning my eviction party. Be prepared, it includes jungle juice.
Please. That's just a patriotism boner. I watched Michael phelps win another medal and had to change my underwear.
I'm sorry but if you can't drink a bottle of wine without a glass, I do not think we can be friends.
I just used "et al" in a sext. I thought you'd be proud
Oh like it's the first time I've had a bowl of wine
I woke up to both of you drawing on me in sharpie, unless a glorious threesome was had the night before that is not okay.
Who says it wasn't?
honestly if there were pictures of last night i would be embarrassed.... im embarrassed without pictures
Truth. Though I have held steadfast to the notion while the rest of you wavered. I had faith in his homosexuality.
My new gym is popular with trophy wives. They’re talking about yachts and plastic surgery
Learn their secrets! I want to meet men with Maseratis. The meat heads and Mustangs scene is getting old
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