In other news I saw a pack of make believe zombies walking down green st.
gotta love wednesdays
Dude. He drives a mini. Therefore he's a virgin
just passed out again, this time at a subway. On a positive not they gave me a free sandwich, pretty sure out pity but at this point i don't care
I have pictures of you taking tequila shots off the front of the police car when the cop wasn't looking.
Definitely need to find a less healthy bootycalls. All this bitch got in her fridge is feta, English muffins and wheat grass. What the fuck can I make with that???
Found 2 Coors, problem solved.
Oh that's what I forgot last night.. To make out with her.
I drank beer out of some sort of animal horn all night, then we fucked to a "viking metal" album. I feel like I should go pillage something to complete the Norse trifecta.
Napping in front of family members can be embarrassing when you get a christmas boner in your sleep
I woke up naked with my work shoes on
Wanna have a sleepover and take me to court in the morning?
Well I may have gotten laid but I over drafted buying pizza so I think that negates everything
Wow two curved penises in one weekend. I feel like this may be good luck. Like finding a four leaf clover
I ate 2 pot cookies before we left the house. Fuck Pokemon. I'm playing my own game.
I haven't answered because I haven't figured out a polite way of saying fuck no
there's crying, and people are upset, and there's a love triangle, and a broken heart, and so much estrogen
Randomize
