cruising supermarkets, asking random people where i can get weed. fuck alaska
Just got roadhead in a driving snowstorm. That shit should be a Winter X games event.
Just did a kegstand with my dad. Happy fathers day.
it'll be like the batcave but for manwhores
Rolling one last joint on my Psych textbook before trading it in. I might actually cry.
This whole night would have been avoided if the liquor store had air heads
I am not ready to suck todays dick. Todays dick just laughed and came on my face.
Lets be real here, you loved it when I was on top. With and without the machete.
Got into Princeton. So excited about the mommy-issue-over-achieving-cock I get to ride the next 4 years!!!
Dude if i sent you a picture of the inside of my fridge would you be able to break down and explain everything that was in it?
Personally, if my roommate had a nice friend who made me dinner, gave me free beer, a 4am meal, a couch to sleep on in an apartment on the beach, and breakfast when I woke up, and I found out that said roommate was fucking her, I'd be all... right on! She's cool! Thanks for the quesadillas!
I was just trying to flirt with James Franco but she kept telling me to take shots out of Ron Burgundy's mouth
We set around a table in a hotel room and he spoon fed Molly to everyone there... I felt sketch for sec but then... Oh well.
He sent me a dick pic from his living room and it has pictures of his three kids in the background
color coded lube a great way to organize my bootie calls
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