u know whats better than using ur vibrator? using it w/ jeopardy on in the background and half moaning the correct final jeopardy question. yeah that just happened.
I fucking love fucking science majors-- she told me that she wanted to know if her gag reflex got better or worse with alcohol, and that her initial evidence had been inconclusive. So, next few weeks, yeah, gettin blown periodically. All I have to do is keep a log.
driving around with you guys listening to the beach boys made me very concious of how white you all are.
not sure how we got back down, broken rib says we didn't use stairs
Just puked up hair, tacos and vodka. Hello Memorial Day weekend.
Our fuck buddy relationship took a turn for the worst after we were drunk and I punched him in the face when he asked for a three some with my best friend.
Girl we've come a long way since our first Brazilian wax
Wait is it okay if I still want to fuck the whole USA swim team or is that only acceptable during the Olympics?
I asked if he wanted to sext and he just started sending me pictures of his beard.
I was like kind of drunk but mostly just very enthusiastic about beyonce
This may be a weird question to ask someone who is 21 years old, but are you grounded?
alicia just called me and talked to me in "the eternal language of the dinosaurs" and then kind of roared and gurgled. what kind of 4th of july are you guys having?
the boozy kind. is there any other?
Meanwhile I'm googling glory holes in Vegas
Egg rolls and cum. Not my worst snack.
I fell into a police barricade, a cop helped me up and asked if I've been drinking. I just looked at him and said "dude.." He proceeded to take out his handcuffs
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