I walked downstairs and there were 50 sorority girls. I wasn't expecting an audience during my walk of shame.
He just called shotgun on the way to the squad car.
Just warning you the last time I had captain Morgan I gave a blow job to a guy that looked like Jesus.
I had a great time except for the part where you called another guy, told him you were in a cab - not on a date - and that you'd meet him at a bar in 15 minutes. but besides that it was awesome. Next time capping you at two glasses of wine
Dude she said she'd let me snort a line off her ass now I just have to wait for them to break up
He got me a cake that said " Congratulations on the dick "
You have mono. It's like being pregnant, your are excused from normal social niceties like responding to people.
The highlight of the trip was definitely my dad telling me that I "used to be his prettiest daughter."
he's smothering me... and not in the good, can you move your thigh off my face please?.. way
Then you guys just all showered together...?
My hook-up from last week somehow found me at the club, saw the girl I was trying to fuck, kissed me right in front of her, and walked off.
he'll eat me out, but god forbid we double dip when sharing salsa
Lmao. K I'll be 100% honest. I was over at your place like 12 hours ago with your roommate. If I hadn't of been there then I'd take you up on your booty call offer. So. If you're not creeped out another time please?
I just want a man in my bed on a regular basis, who cuddles, and who I can also occasionally hang out with outside of my bedroom. Is that too much to ask for?
Soooo you're telling me you support us groom's men giving lap dances to willing patrons?
Randomize
