Send those Picts to my email please. From last night
Ps thx for the porn on my phone
;) ur welcome
how do you spell 'special'? like slow?
S P E L L C H E C K
No you dumbass thats not right
I just rubbed my dick on something in your apartment. Can you guess what?
Found him. He was passed out on the couch at the new place in a room full of burnt pizza smoke.
Your dignity remains intact. He, on the other hand, is completely convinced he slept with your cat.
Just saw the stripper pole on the road that we threw out of the party bus last night
Beer lympzucs are ki7lling me
Dong worry about me. I just cashed bottle of wine when I found out he was in town, I'm being dramatic. I'll text you tomorrow when I'm sober and my face stops bleeding
I'm so confused. I feel like I just intentionally took roofies to see where I'd end up.
I woke up with a piece of pizza duct taped too my hand and a paragraph written on my chest. Good night is say
The blackout version of me left a ransom note to the sober self. Somebody needs to control that guy
It's my 3rd annual 21st birthday party. Disney themed. There will be blood.
I think I'm goin to jail but either way I had a blast.
The air tonight was full of shame when we saw each other.
Well if u wouldn't have had sex on the front porch last night I think that could have been avoided.
the next morning his mother came in to tell me that she made breakfast. she told me to put my clothes on too. awkward.
Randomize
