Oh and ps....i was sleeping soundly until i woke up by the sound of amy on the phone with her mom sobbing hysterically because she can't stop having the shits.
No. untill you have done a puke that contains nothing but semen and tequila, you do not 'feel my pain'
Your sister reminds me of me at her age. Stop her while you can.
I swear it started with good intentions but then my slutty side took over and we started playing strip checkers
What's a "vodkaffle"?
It's where she puts vodka in the waffle mix.
I'm mentally preparing myself to hang out with him by staring into the mirror saying "thou shalt not get naked" over and over.
So I was thinking for Halloween I'd do Dr. Jekyll and Mr. Hyde....for my vagina.
Omg just had weirdest best cab advice situation ever. I kissed the cabbies hand as I was leaving like he was the pope and cried
We're trying to make our wedding vows nice but meeting on OkCupid fucks that up entirely.
Is it weird that sometimes I like to have sex for the health benefits and workout more than the pleasure
He was telling me how he was trying to grow up. And then 2 minutes later, he told me he was tripping on lsd for the first time.
Listen, I booty called my boss last night from the company phone. I may need to brush up my resume.
During my first week as an adjunct prof, I played a fiercely fought game of squash with a law student and we wound up having hot, sweaty, angry sex right on the floor of the court. She is either the best or worst thing to happen to my academic career. Will let you know.
She was drunk running in the middle of the street when a cop saw her,picked her up and dropped her off at her house. This really doesn't surprise me.
Will exercising make me less horny?
Randomize
