Does getting a boner while watching the celtic women sing opera on ETV make me cultured?
get home. someone threw up in the fishtank last night.
You were in my dream and you got the lyrics to lollipop tattooed on your chest. Don't get it, it wasnt that cool.
All I know is that we apparently made a drink we named The Single Girl which is rum, vodka, grain alcohol, and sprite and rolled around in the backyard.
Apparently the cops have a video of me singing bob seger "Night moves".
I mean... It's a win/win situation. I mentor the kid for an hour and then I get to fuck his mom. I know deep down I'm helping them both
Ok well I'll be up all night studying if you need a wake up call or a place to put your penis.
We have six bottles of wine and we are at target buying baby oil to grease up the sleds with, just in case you're interested.
if all that ever happens for the rest of forever is drinking wine and eating popcorn, ill be okay
I won the booty shaking contest by mooning the whole bar
Well if she's the kinda girl that doesn't want you after seeing a pic of your balls squeezed together, she's not the girl for you.
Some girl dressed in nothing but Wonder Woman underwear and a cape on her ass just started twerking all over us. Remind me why I'd never been to a midnight of Rocky horror before?
my liver is dry heaving
I snuck in through the doggy door to get his vodka. Do you think my ex will know?
My sister just poured me a dbl Ciroc on the rocks and said "the ice makes it festive." Honestly what a role model.
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