I would say the hottest chick there looked like Susan Boyle and the ugliest like Bea Arthur
Nice use of current day folklore
What should our trivia night team be named?
Define Statutory
so I told him I hadn't been laid since Bush was president. Right after he cums, he says "Welcome to the Obama Administration".
So not only just find my adoption papers that I didnt know about in my parents house, but they say "child shows some signs of mental retardation".
new rule: cockblock me if I have had over a fifth of jack. no matter what.
She devotes each year to either men or women. I waited all year for her to be straight, tonights the night.
Walking in to my alcoholic Assessment meeting with a black eye = 40% awkward 60% awesome
For her birthday she wants to, " try something different with our butts a funnel and a bottle of whiskey"
Our room will be decorated with my urine.
I might not remember all of last night but I clearly remember the part where I humped the mailbox.
No we are not "bros" because I came out of my moms vagina& you went in there.
I've come to the conclusion that Jesus and 2013 are haters.
Tell me again why I left before the topless cake fight
You cant use biscuit as a chaser
I spend so much of my life shaving my body hair off and I want nothing more than his beard in all my hairless places.
Randomize
