So how gross is it that Woopie Goldberg has a vagina? She's like the exact opposite of a boner....
I would describe it as pure and unadulterated shock, mixed with horror and a touch of nausea.
eating kraft dinner with my face. no forks.
Do Not. I repeat. DO NOT DRINK WHISKEY TO COPE. You will end up in jail. LEARN FROM THE PRO
I blew him while he was standing up and he drooled on my head
hes duct taped to the wall and we're throwing eggs at him. i love thirsty thursday.
He left his cock-ring in my truck.
Consider it a gay sex souvenir.
You told me that you were as fast as lightning and you wanted to race me. Then you faceplanted after falling down the stairs.
Imagine the quality of nudes you could send with a selfie stick
At one point, the bartender wrote out the words "please kill me" on some receipt paper and slid it across the bar to me.
I'm watching Trainwreck with Jeff and realizing that I'm the John Cena in my relationship.
Erin was right. There were bees at the after hours.
the universe is starting to freak me out.. ive now had sex with 3 people who were born on the same day..
I have so much to do, no motivation, and Harry Potter is on. You KNOW whats taking priority in my life right now
I couldn’t resist. He had a camouflage condom. You know I love a man in a uniform
Randomize
