and then he said that the only reasonable explanation as to why I got swine flu was because all I ever do is join the bandwagon
Dude they have ski ball. Anywhere that has skiball is bound to be bangin.
Let's just cut to the chase. I'm not interested in anything romantic but I aAM interested in Tom Petty and maybe getting high and fucking you again for old times sake.
I bought you a small gift as a preemptive apology for being a drunken slut tonight.
I just watched the lion king for the first time in years. It's like the equivalent of a really good blow job.
She has puke on the back of her shirt not quite sure how the hell she did that
FULL ON LADY WOOD. YOU CAN SEE THE VEIN
Wow I didn't even consider the possibility of him having ED. I'm gaining so many life experiences from dating an older man
Would it be a good deed to leave a 32 pack of bud light next to a bum sleeping in the park?
These kids are nice. Shrooms make everything so nice.
Well puke fest 2014 just happened
I have a corndog on my dresser and a trashcan of puke. Thanks for a great night!
dont you DARE use my tequila influenced words against me
I'm not drunk or hungover and I don't have to work. My body is sooo confused!
Let’s not dwell on the negatives. I have a fat ass and suck dick well.
Randomize
