Wow, Pearl Harbor and The Notebook are on. Its like the Im going to kill myself marathon.
at least 'blackout me' had enough sense to take the puke covered duvet off the comforter.
It's not normal to lose a tooth eating a McDouble.
Today was my first day of hebrew and I learned how to say give me sex... I think I can quit now
Ok the fact that you know THAT phrase perfectly is terrifying. You just proved you can slut it up in mulitiple languages.
We got the idea to smoke under his bed because, and I quote, "it'd be just like going camping"
afterward, he apologized, hugged me, and then gave me a granola bar and said “this is my apology gift.”
Well my door is unlocked for you, I'll be in the bathtub drinking a pre-mixed bottle of margarita until I forget the degree to which my life sucks.
I have a weapon and I'm not blacked out. Good as gold
I lost all of my bathing suit tops.. This is both a success and a failure
And your boyfriend doesn't mind you constantly taking pictures of his dick just to freak out your brother?
its more like he's accepted that he can't stop me
Have you ever been up at one in the morning and thought to yourself, "I do not know nearly enough about penguin reproduction"?
He let me eat chexmix while we fucked... I think I love him.
He makes me want to cheat on my other 3 boyfriends..
If we both don't have awesome filthy sexual experiences to share in the morning...we are no longer best friends.
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