Most guys don't get turned on by "skinny, gangly legged girl with glasses laying in bed touching herself." You better start working on your diction if you're gonna keep up the sexting.
Forgot that I saved my paper as "Eat Shit Edwards" and e-mailed it because I missed class. I'm sure Prof. Edwards will be delighted when she gets it. I don't anticipate a passing grade.
yeah you're probably right.. i should stop equating love with getting naked on a webcam for him.
God my Facebook chat is a graveyard of old blowjobz
That awesome feeling when you are pooping on the same toilet that nobel laureates have pooped on
come over we're fb stalking guys who were dressed as bananas last night because i can't remember which one i blew
Why am I cleaning the house twerking to anaconda wearing a bears jersey and helmet?
On the bright side, only one more day until we aren't sober anymore.
Went to go look for a friend that was missing since 3am, found her passed out in the hallway of the apartment, guessing it was a good night
You can call me ugly and you can call me fat,but don't you EVER say my meme game is weak.
My neck is sore from all the headbanging. And I can't tell the difference between the jello stains and cum stains.
We just did a u turn on the highway to settle a dispute in a game of slug bug
I woke up with my converse still on and a plate of pasta next to my face, if that gives you any indication of how my night went
She said she didn't care that I was gay and wants to ride the fucking rainbow
I was singing Colors of the Wind and swigging vodka and still felt like more of an adult.
Randomize
