on a scale of one to ten, how awkward would it i told him i had to go change my tampon and then left?
11
so i decided not to tell her that her fiance is cheating since i already bought the bridesmaid dess
you kept screaming that dicks were growing out of your back and then you started crying cause they were so far from your vag
could you get any more awkward?
I can't get a boner in the bathroom of a buffet.
You looked like my 4th grade science fair volcano project when you burped. Told you chugging a 40 would be awesome.
I woke up to his gay cousin telling me I had the prettiest boobs. I don't even wanna know.
What happened with the girl wasn't a gay thing. It was just a mutual respect and want for sex. The guys just weren't there.
Call it what you want. You fucked a girl.
I got about 15 snapchats from you with your hand saying "you want cheese sticks" or something like that and one of some weird looking weed
you told me your favorite colors were "pink" "no pants" and "Mexican food"
I woke up and found my apartment really clean, appearantly drunk me couldn't tolerate living there anymore and left sober me a lot of insulting post-its...
I really don't think my body can handle another night of drinking
Lol you talk like you have a choice
I am worried that I am gonna die before the weekend is over
In other news I was masturbating last night and came really fucking hard to the thought of yelling at a customer....
true. but still. you know how big of a sucker i am for a penis and a pretty face.
So who has the penis shaped party tray? You or your mom?
Bro, I was just laying in bed with this girl and her boyfriend came an woke me up
Randomize
