About tomorrow. if it dosent fit dont force it. Just pushit as far as you can and i'll wiggle the rest of the way
Are you going to tell your therapist we boned?
the liability waiver did not state that i couldn't bring my bottle of wine in the bouncy castle. it did Not.
Instead of having sex, we spent the entire night making pillow forts and have sword fights. I think I'm in love
so i have my big date this weekend, and i was practicing giving head with a bottle in the shower. i stopped and looked at the botton of the bottle. it was PURE MOLD! if i die, dont tell the doctors how this happened....
she uses eco-friendly sex toys. she is the literal definition of a hippie.
Its amazing how creative youll get when your house has been out of toilet paper for a week and a half
I thought the cops would know I was on shrooms because I was 10ft tall.
happy find a boyfriend by next Valentines Day. Its like a new years resolution but depressing
Hey, the point is, I have 3 guys to fuck to get over the last one. It's my golden rule. You told me to find a hobby! It translated as "find another guy".
That is the opposite way I told you to find a hobby.
When you see a guy in a wheelchair try to be cool and pop a wheelie, and then fall over backward and hit his head, is it funny or sad?
I just heard your voicemail. Glad you like my dick and think I'm cool
gay sex achievement: unlocked
what
you told me you were going out for groceries!!
He told me to be a woman and make him dinner. So I threw a bagel at him and went out to dinner.
He asked me how flexible I was and all I could think about was that time I threw my back out putting in a tampon.
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