I plan on putting pajamas back on after I shower. Today is going to be awesome.
best part, i was ridiculous and none of them were judging me bc they didn't want my vagina. it was like i was a pretty painting
I feel like I'm one of those people who someone looks at and thinks "how did she get into this college"
sexting on a treadmill. speed 9.0 beat that slut!
No mine's bigger. It just looks smaller because I'm drunk
we found his I.D. in the upstairs bathroom...under a towel in a hidden pile of snacks from her kitchen
I'm pretty sure you called me last night and screamed that she was force-feeding you a bagel.
How was the rest of your night?
A little fuzzy and a lot naked.
He cheated on me in real life. I can cheat at words with friends.
I feel like it'll be a success as long as she doesn't end up dead in a ditch. There has to be a line somewhere.
I just contemplated drinking cheese dip. And by "contemplated," I mean "attempted and was forcibly stopped from."
Dollar Store pregnancy tests. For when you sorta wanta know.
They have marijuana tests too!
In the middle of having sex she stopped, said "guess what, it's clitoris awareness week" and then continued fucking me
yea but i missed the pot and poured the boiling water on my dick. shit hurts. aint nothin easy about that mac
1. Everyone on the 1st and 3rd floor heard you. 2. The 3rd floor vibrates when we have sex. 3. The 1st floor can hear the bed squeak.
Randomize
