isnt it creepy that our bodies make people
i dont know why he would complain when i touch him there.
everytime she opens her mouth i wish that i was deaf
I just smoked pot in front of my old Elementary School. It's like my Childhood and Adulthood are coming together in this awesome thing.
I introduced him to the male G-Spot. Don't ever tell me I'm not experienced.
Hes stumbling drunkenly around the streets of New York with a balloon vagina on his head. I'd say hes having a good night.
Luke did at least 8 shots of pure mayonnaise last night. I am not sure if that is better or worse than my 2 cement mixers?
Russians do not operate on the same level as the rest of us. hoping I wake up tomorrow
I swear that when we jog in the morning I can hear it slap between his thighs
He didn't get laid that weekend.. and that is honestly an accomplishment for the rest of us.
We were mid fuck, and he did a Kermit the Frog impression. Is it weird that I was strangely turned on?
I feel like it is our duty to make homophobic people more afraid of us. They're never going to change, but maybe we can get to a "wrath of god" kind of worship-him-or-he'll-destroy-you-with-his-care-bear-stare type thing.
Hey, I found that piece of pizza you lost in my bed last night. Never again...
I feel asleep with my contacts in, with my arms wrapped around a bottle of vodka. Also... Do we have class today?
got the runs at the club last night. wondering when it'll be safe to show my face again.
Randomize
