I'm sorry that you don't think that "Daddy Issues" are a real thing, but I can tell you that some assholes who never went to their daughter's dance recitals are responsible for getting me laid...continuously.
I think they gave out some kind of ugly girl scholarship I don't know about...
Is it illegal to masterbate in an airport?
It's spring break, I'm sure it's ok.
I decided they need a food cart that just roams around the library like the cotton candy people at the circus. But with real food. like tacos cause it sounds delicious.
I miss my brother. He would have fucked the fat girl for me.
I told you I would
I wouldnt do that to you. You're my actual friend
I can't feel my clothes. I'm convinced I'm naked
He ate the contents of an ashtray and didn't puke, I think he can handle drinking a fifth to himself.
but you were the sluttiest panda there and you need to embrace it
I woke up and sent him a text that said 'I'm sorry forever'
I'm in Home Depot and I can feel the straight bob the builders staring at me. I bet it's like I have a rainbow arrow pointing at me.
On your day off do you wanna get wine drunk and take a few episodes of Jerry Springer way too seriously with me?
It figures that the only time one of my videos on Snapchat gets replayed is a video of my Hedonism Bot impression and NOT my nudes
I just my had my first cup of coffee in a week. I think I might orgasm.
All I want to do is drink an excessive amount of free alcohol bought from strange men, while taking frequent trips to the bathroom to snort an assortment of illicit drugs off dirty toilet seats. Break cannot get here quick enough...
i was really depressed when i left the health dept this morning after i had to write a higher number next to "partners" than "age"
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