smoked weed with Joakim Noah last night....if he was half as fast to the basket as he is to grab a joint from me we'd have another championship on our hands
some girl that im facebook friends with has H1N1, im scared to even go to her facebook page
He sat on a barstool and did the robot for 3 hours - I'm pretty sure he enjoyed himself.
The drunken tricycle race really added some class to the Tour de Franzia. Until everyone wiped out and started puking.
I'm so horny
I have no idea who this is, but I'm up for a lecture on self-respect
Plotting your own moral demise should not be this fun
they bet me shots that I couldn't give people piggyback rides around the club just cause I'm 125lbs and a girl...I had a line forming after the third guy.
Dude that girl I hooked up with Tuesday is in lecture. I told her I was from the Dominican visiting my cousin and was leaving the next day. Hiding under my hood and hangover.
Dave used his AAA card to get my car towed to my house so I could get drunk. Evil genius.
Ugh. I guess I'm crying loudly or something. My mom just came in and gave me milk, chocolate, a Xanax, and her weed "for the break up blues". Her ways of affection are so odd.
And my nipple is sore from him biting it. That is not a complaint.
Everything was going well until he very loudly said that he wanted to cum on my fingernails.
I met her parents last night. Her dad smelled like weed and kept yelling "I HAVE ALLERGIES AHHH MY EYES ARE BURNING!" During dinner It had to be good weed he didn't even know he was yelling.
Please explain the hospital band on my wrist.
Bro i just made a pipe out of a mechanical pencil and the top to an eye drop bottle. Does that make me some kind of pot god?
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