what do you mean I googled how to give an awesome blow job?
I'll be there in 5 min. If not, read this again.
well i did drunkenly flip his snowmobile going 90, so i can kind of see why hes mad
in light of our recent drunken behavior, i think it's time we seriously consider hiring ourselves a babysitter.
I told him the truth. Truth leads to vodka. Vodka leads to tequila. Tequila leads to prison.
DON'T LET IAN EAT HIS PEANUT BUTTER!!!
Just remembered that I poured a whole bottle of tylenol in there. It's chunky. It's deadly.
I don't know at which point last night turned terribly, terribly wrong, but it was somewhere around Motel 6, specifically the parking lot.
This hangover is so bad, we are pregaming Chinese food with pizza.
We woke up at 7:30am. We got a 30 rack, yelled at all the freshman shackers walkin back to their dorms, played a game of beer die, and boned all before 11:00am. I found my soulmate
He's easy on the eyes, light on his feet, and rough in bed...what more could a girl ask for in a rebound?
We accept all of your sexual lovers, Jewish, episcopalian, atheist. Dick is dick
It began the way the best stories do—with some naïve jackasses in a place they had no business being at.
You invited these random guys into your apartment that you met in the hallway...& then you started screaming at them to get out cause you didn't know who they were.
Ever been to a strip club with one stripper? I have. And she sucked.
He woke me with blue berry pancakes and a blow job. He's a keeper.
Randomize
