At a strip club after monster truck rally. You should be here
isnt it creepy that our bodies make people
i think i got so emotional from a mix of getting my period and slapping the bag like five times
We were laughing at the passed out guy who had gone to sleep under the car in the McDonald's lot until we realized it was you.
i can't tell if you're serious or not, but 420 is gonna be pirate themed
was it morally wrong to have used his girlfriends makeup after i fucked him?
So i do have strep. My apologies to the british guy from this weekend. You now have one more reason to hate america
That would be a dream come true. Seriously, he's like my mount everest, my life's ambition is to climb him.
As a 47 yo who just boned a 22 yo, it was definitely a walk of pride. She is a major feather in my aging cap.
Its guy fieris flavor town of suffering™
He got the life proof phone case so he could jack off in the shower without his wife knowing
Man, it's really obvious that I was either handcuffed or tied up last night. Either way, not something you'd want coworkers knowing.
I am pants-free in the living room. This is liberating.
Found your bra
Where?
Hanging in the tree
still drunk.please come get me.he kicked me out because i couldn't stop laughing about passing out in the middle of taking his virginity.
Randomize
