member when we used to take shits together before volleyball games?
I bought the tickets, he brought the weed. thanks to you, we had to roll a joint out of my bible paper.
This whole living in Ohio thing is getting reaaaaallly old.
Just got to school and somone already mentioned the amount of cereal im carrying.
I just peed behind the dumpster and dedicated it to you. Can i call u?
He returned my car yesterday. Found a duffel bag with beef jerky, condoms, and a handgun this morning. Slightly concerned
I might have been the first person to be rolling balls at a referee seminar
We're taking a shot every time Landon Donovan takes a shot. It's clever, sort of.
Your favorite boobs are sending you seasons greetings
Some how my underwear was hanging from the antlers of a antelope head on the wall of the hotel........
Excuse me while I take my birth control pill for today to prevent getting pregnant from hearing about your sex life
That car ride home was pretty awkward. Your feeling up the girlfriend to the guy who's throwing up out the window. Thanks for that.
I’d feel the same about religion. We can talk about it, but I want you to go down on me first
Maverick's sitting in jail wearing a turkey costume and I am soooo jealous.
He told me their parents think of me as the "drunk friend"...oddly enough, I'm ok with that
Randomize
